UPDATE: New entries are in!
- 1. Create a video game weapon of your own design.
- 2. Slap it in any piece of concept art, a video game screenshot, or simply draw something by hand!
- 3. Give us a short blurb (use spelling and grammar) about your weapon, what it does, and why it's awesome.
Send your entries to mckinley_noble@gamepro.com*** (one per user) and we'll post them here on SlobsofGaming. LongHairedOffender and KenTheGreat1 will select a winner sometime next Monday. Also, hit the jump to watch a clip from Code Monkeys, courtesy of G4TV!
PS: We'd also like to give a special thanks to Spooty_the_Gameguru for the contest idea. Thanks for reading! (Send KenTheGreat1 a PM so we can send you something from our swag pile.)
*Code Monkeys will not actually set your furniture on fire.
** PlayStation 3 or X360 only. We're keeping the Wii games for now.
*** Spamming our e-mails is bad karma.
Submitted by KenTheGreat1
Sample Entry: The Liquified B.U.M. Stool Super Soaker
B.U.M., or Bum Urinary Mansludge, is the most lethal substance known to humankind, weaponized in this handy dandy mega-sized super soaker cannon! One squirt of these foul-smelling hobo juices will not only obliterate shields, but also disintegrate your flesh and health meter. (Comes with an optional septic tank-refill backpack!)
Submitted by KingOfTwilight
Laser Chainsaw
"It cuts! With the power and noise of a chainsaw, as well as the fact it's a Goddamn laser!"
Submitted by teh2Dgamer
Xbox Live Parenter
"The Parenter 2000 is a simple weapon to be sprung on potty mouth youths across Xbox Live. It's simple really, the Parenter 2000 is an electronic paddle used in game to spank the thousands of curse ridden third graders that have taken over the online realm. The paddle, once used in the game, then sends signals to said adolescent's 360, which then uses the attached headset to send electronic signals into the kid's brain which simulate the feeling of being spanked. The Xbox Live Parenter 2000, does the jobs for countless deadbeat parents across the world and teaches their kids the discipline and respect, that the parents themselves wont."
Submitted by GIANT CLANK
Bionic/Organically Enhanced Spider Grenade
"My idea is essentially a grenade that contains thousands of eggs for bionic/organic enhanced spiders that will crawl into the skin, mouth, eyes, ear, or anus (lol) of any nearby soldiers, using an IA to separate enemies from friendlies. After the spiders have entered the enemy's body they make their way to the cerebellum where they mate and lay thousands of eggs, distorting the enemy's brain so that he wouldn't know what was wrong with his head. eventually, the spiders will either continue mating until the enemy's head explodes (Picture attached) or stop mating and take control of the enemy's body to work for the original attacker. the spider's ability to mate gives the original attacker infinite ammo, assuming that the enemy's body acts as enough food and energy to reproduce."
Submitted by ShortHairedOffender
Ghetto Blaster
"Now unveiling the GhettoBlaster. But don't get to close to these sounds or you are likely to die. The GhettoBlaster plays music so loud that it shakes the brain at high speeds. Not only is it fast, it is so fast that it will cause your head to explode! You can change the cassette in the front from rap to country and everything in between."
Submitted by FETALJUICE
Submitted by GuitarHero9
Axe of Destruction
"Green controls plants, Red makes fire, Yellow brings down fire, Blue unleashes Dark Energy, and Orange creates Natural Disasters."
Submitted by abalam
Submitted by Denvire
Ramaru: The Ultimate Elemental Blade
"Ramaru is the ultimate Elemental Blade. Every strike does cold, poison, shock AND fire damage all at the same time at intense levels, making it so anyone who has any specific resistances will suffer from the other elements not being resisted. This, compiled with the blade's fine craftsmanship of the rare metal Orchrillium, a very strong and almost impossible metal to craft, makes this blade just that much more deadly. Need a range shot? Have no fear, with training and skill, one can summon the blade's forces to "shoot" from the blade, allowing opponents who are far away to still suffer from the blade's blood lust. The wielder, Mr.Baldy, is the most well trained individual in this blade's art of warfare, so don't let his smile fool you!"
Submitted by dreedyjr.
Quadruple Nunchuck Of Gaming Mastery
"My weapon is the Quadruple Nunchuck Of Gaming Mastery. It combines the four controllers from the greatest era of gaming (DreamCast, Xbox, PS2, Gamecube). With it you can lay waste to all who oppose the beholder, and permanently silence the prepubescent boys who constantly shout meaningless profanities."
Submitted by chiodos
The LHO Mask
"This mysterious mask was cut from LOZ: Majora's Mask because Nintendo felt it was too violent and dark. Once Link puts on this mask, he changes form, much like the other masks. However, this mask is much more...brutal. It is said to have belonged to Ganonorf's father, and therefore is pure evil. Your hair grows out, your clothing changes to a Gorgoth T-shirt, and you sprout horns out of your head. Also, the music of the game switches to Metal. As far as weapons are concerned, no Master Sword here! You get a state of the art, ultra-sharp katana (complete with blood stains on the edge). Also, the large gaping hole in the mouth spews out acid that can burn through kryptonite!"
